In boxing there is sometimes a "3 knock down rule" which usually means that if a fighter is knocked down 3 times in the same round he is declared defeated by technical knock out (TKO). I want to encourage my fellow knocked down fighters out there that there is no "3 knock down rule" in the Kingdom of God. God's grace is waaaaay bigger than our knock downs. In fact, that's what Easter is all about.
A year ago I was writing my resignation letter to God and writing a rough draft social media post titled, "No Longer Fit For Ministry". After 5+ years of intense caregiving, the loss of my awesome parents, the way my Dad died, the loss of some friends, the loss of my dogs, near personal bankruptcy, my renovation home in shambles, exhaustion on top of exhaustion, (and so much more) I was whittled down to a dumpster fire... dismantled down a train wreck... I had just about lost my mind. I reached the most dangerous point a human being can get to - I didn't care anymore. I didn't have anything left in me to care anymore. I shattered my "care bone". Why would I want to care anymore since everything I poured my heart into caring about just died anyways or fell apart. If this is what I get for trying then why try anymore. I love God with all my heart, but like Jonah, Elijah, Job, David, & Solomon I had enough of this life. I just longed to die. My friends, that's a dangerous place to be. When you no longer care anymore what aren't you willing to do even if it means rebelling against God. "The mind controlled by the sinful nature is death" (Romans 8:6). The Prodigal Son became my mentor. I was having a melt down, breakdown, & childish temper tantrum all at once. And just as I was experiencing the greatest spiritual defeat of my life I came to my senses. I relented. I repented. In one moment my greatest spiritual defeat ushered in my greatest spiritual victory. I got up off the ground. I had been knocked down by the devil a hundred times, but in this type of fight there is no "3 knock down rule" in effect. Knock downs don't count as knockouts in God's Kingdom. Just ask those same guys - Jonah, Elijah, Job, David, & Solomon. In prayer In prayer I was turning in my resignation to God, "God, I'm no longer fit for ministry. I'll never forget how God ministered to me in that moment. I think I offended God more by my attempt to resign than by all my rebellion. I remember feeling God impress on my heart, "You don't think my grace is big enough for you!! I'm the Good Father of the Prodigal Son. I specialize in running to and welcoming back my Prodigal Sons." In an instant He tore up my resignation letter and simply said, "It's time to get up off the ground. It's time to get back into the fight. It's time to get back to the work of the ministry. Learn from your knock downs. Grow from your knock downs. But don't over-empasize your knock downs. My grace is way bigger than your knock downs. And stop doing so much of the work in your own power. You can't accomplish supernatural results in human power. It's not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit."
I don't know where you are on your journey with God. You may be an undefeated heavyweight champion of the world. Or you may be, like me, a fighter who got knocked down so much that you don't have anymore fight left inside of you. I want to encourage you that I've been there (just a year ago), and there is life again after the knock downs. There is a loving, gracious, and very kind God that dies on planks of wood just so He can pick you up off the ground and breathe new life into you... that cross doesn't lose its affect after salvation... it's not just so the lost can be saved; it's also so prodigals can return home. Jesus will always leave the 99 that are accounted for in order to find the 1 who has wandered off. No one gets left behind on His watch! There is life after failure. Just ask Peter. Just ask Paul. Just ask me.
From Survival to Revival =)
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